


As The Veil Descends

by thosewhofall



Category: James Bond (Movies), Skyfall (2012) - Fandom
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Gen, Kidnapping, Mentions of self-harm, PTSD, Torture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-17
Updated: 2013-01-17
Packaged: 2017-11-25 20:47:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/642813
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thosewhofall/pseuds/thosewhofall
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Q goes back to work after the latest mission, and he's not quite the same. There's really only one person that understands why. Though if he had his choice, he'd never wish what James Bond had seen upon him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	As The Veil Descends

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Hi! This is my first time Posting a fic on AO3. If this seems familiar you probably read it on my tumblr but I hope you enjoy it anyway! <3

When Q got back to HQ for the first time since the incident, James Bond was nowhere to be found. It hadn't even taken much digging for him to discover that 007 hadn't been back in since he returned from his latest mission. 'It was dangerous one' he'd heard several times the agents really had absolutely no idea what had happened in the last three weeks. The department had practically been on lockdown and they hadn't been told why. Q knew why.  


Q knew exactly what mission Bond had been on and exactly why MI6 had locked down for 20 days. Not even a full three weeks, imbeciles. MI6 locked down because that was standard procedure for the department when Q-branch wasn't functional. And it was dangerous to go on missions when Q-branch support wasn't there to assist you. So yes, Bond had been on a dangerous mission, because it was difficult to have Q-branch support when the mission had been to recover the kidnapped Quartermaster.  


Q tried not to think about it as he sat down at his dusty desk, scowling before returning to his feet to get a rag because dust would make him sneeze. He felt okay for the first time in 20 days, he didn’t need to be sneezing.  


In some ways, Q is glad that Bond isn’t there when he got in because he wasn't 100% sure that he was ready to see Bond. Seeing Bond would bring back the last time he had seen Bond, three days ago, and that was not a memory that Q was terribly anxious to revisit. It was associated with an uncomfortable situation and a murderously protective 007 that Q hadn't contemplated the reasoning behind just yet. However, he had to get back to work, and despite what M had tried to convince him of; he was a trained MI6 agent and kidnappings happen.  


Only usually they happen to the double OH's and normally not support staff like Q-branch. Usually they don't involve torture, via pain both mental and physical. Usually, the agent can get themself out of the scenario. Usually, the agent doesn’t fall into a pit of despair after 9 days. (He scratched them into his skin with a sharp edge of his cuffs. There are only 9 tally marks, Q isn’t sure what happened for the next seven days.) Usually, the agent responding isn’t James Bond and usually they don't get angrier to see Q's blood soaked shirt and bruised face. Usually, this wouldn't have happened to him.  


But it did. It had. Q was fine now, he swore. He was functional, up to speed on what had happened while he had been incapacitated. He had been congratulated and given a raise for protecting England and refusing to hack the servers for the group that had taken him. He's been given an increased budget to play with too. All in all, not bad for just 16 days of pain and torture.  


Until training begins for the newer recruits and at the first gunshot he's crawled under his desk panting and sweating. He stays there for an hour, until the gunfire stops, and then crawls out to see M staring at him expectantly. Q straightens his cardigan and turns back to the computer. "PTSD," he said by way of explanation. "Perfectly normal after what I've been through."  


"How on earth did you get through your Psych eval?" M asks, and Q can hear his foot tapping.  


Q smiles to himself. "I know the questions to the Psych eval. Practicing in the mirror the night before." He continues typing.  


"Q, you aren't ready to be back."  


Q stopped and turned around. "I'm never going to be ready to be back." He admits, "M, there are still gaps in my memory and I don't forget things. I can't imagine what they did that made me block out the memories, but it will come back to me eventually. I'm not a double oh. I'm not made for the situation I was in. I will never be ready to come back, but you need me and MI6 needs me."  


M nods his agreement. “You need to talk to someone about it.”  


Q pauses and his shoulders sink, “What can Psych possibly have to say to me. They’ve never been there, they don’t understand.”  


M smirks and Q can tell because he does this little laugh when he does it. “I didn’t say you needed to talk to Psych.”  


\--  


Q has jumped every time someone enters his office, but Bond does so quietly, and it takes Q’s turning to see him to realize he’s even there. And then he does jump so hard he bites his lip. “007.” He says, staring at him.  
“M told me that you’ve not been yourself.”  


Q’s eyebrows pull together, staring at him in confusion. He’s come up with three new weapons, a knife that doubles as a syringe, with a release lever that injects a poison and begins a rapid deterioration of the victims body. He’s made yet another variation on the tracker, and after what he’s been through, he’s made a new variation on a cyanide capsule, made with chemicals that will actually kill you, especially after seeing the effects of cyanide on Silva. “I’ve been better than I’ve ever been.”  


“Which is why you’ve soundproofed your door and jump whenever you see someone enter your office, right? And why even now your heart has started beating faster because you’ve seen me and you’re remembering the last time you’ve seen me.”  


Q stares, “How…”  


“You’re not the first MI6 agent that has been kidnapped, Q, and you’re far from the last.” Bond’s eyes crinkled as he stared at the Quartermaster, “You’re avoiding the memories. You need to confront them.”  


Q set his jaw, “Not all of us are made to be able to handle those kinds of situations.” He said in a low voice. “Not all of us are you.”  


“You could be.” 007 said. “Q you have the potential to be an asset to MI6. You survived 16 days of torture without bursting a cyanide capsule—”  


“I don’t have one.” Q said quickly, turning around to his computer.  


“What?” Bond was puzzled.  


“I don’t have a cyanide capsule.” Q repeated, “I hadn’t had one implanted and with what I’ve developed I’ll never have to. The capsule I’ve designed would have actually killed me.”  


“So you put up with 16 days of torture without a way out and you’re still not sure that you’re made to handle that kind of a situation.”  


Q turned around, “I have scars on my thigh that I scratched into myself to keep count of the days. There are nine of them. I blocked out seven days from my memory, 007, that’s not something one recovers from easily. I don’t remember an entire week of my life, god only knows what could have happened to me.”  


“You were alive.” Bond said, stepping up behind Q’s body, so close that a shudder ripped through his body. “If you had done anything, given anything to them, you would have been killed.” Bond’s voice was close to Q’s ear and Q gripped the desk before him to keep his knees from buckling.  


“Yes, I’m alive and I’m fine and M needs to shove off.” Q rolls away from Bond’s body. “I’ll be okay Bond. I swear.”  


Bond nods, “As you wish.” He turns to walk away.  


“007.” The man stops as Q decides to speak. “Thank you for getting me out of there.”  


Bond doesn’t turn around, “It was a risk worth taking to retrieve you. Get well, Q.”


End file.
